Kind Is The New Cool
"Every small act of kindness creates a wave of goodness that can change the world." — Desmond Tutu
One of my favorite t-shirts, which I wear often, is a plain white tee with five words in big block letters: "KIND IS THE NEW COOL." It serves as a simple reminder to anyone who sees it that kindness is a beautiful energy to carry with you throughout life.
Kindness is generally defined as being thoughtful, considerate, and helpful. It doesn't have to cost you anything: a smile, a friendly greeting to someone passing by, a gentle touch or word of encouragement, holding a door open for someone, helping a stranger struggling to carry a heavy load, or offering a compliment to someone who really needs it that day. These simple yet powerful acts can connect us to others and make a positive difference in their lives.
Numerous studies have explored the impact kindness can have on our mental, emotional, and physical well-being — for both the giver and the receiver. The scientific evidence supporting the benefits of being kind is compelling.
One study by the University of Ohio found that ordinary expressions of kindness can elevate our mood, reduce stress levels, and potentially alleviate symptoms of depression and anxiety. Other research supports these findings and highlights additional benefits, such as increased happiness and self-esteem, heightened empathy and compassion, improved relationships, and a greater sense of connectivity with others.
The effects on our physical health are equally convincing. Researchers have found that kindness can produce positive biochemical changes in our brains, boosting serotonin and dopamine levels (which contribute to feelings of happiness and fulfillment), and releasing endorphins (our body’s natural pain relievers). In fact, kindness is also good for our hearts: it can lower blood pressure and reduce cortisol levels (the stress hormone).
Lose yourself in kindness, and you’ll discover the best version of yourself. - Mahatma Gandhi
It is truly amazing that such a small, simple gesture can have such an outsized positive effect. People who regularly demonstrate kindness towards others tend to enjoy better health and well-being. Period.
With so many clear benefits, I wonder: why aren’t we tripping over ourselves to be kind?
Consider that we now live in a world where media often feeds us a constant stream of stories and opinions that showcase people being mean to one another: hurling insults, engaging in smear campaigns, and sometimes displaying outright cruelty. Yet, why is it that we rarely hear about or witness acts of kindness in our daily lives?
Perhaps kindness is happening right before our eyes, but we are so preoccupied and overwhelmed with our own lives that we fail to notice these opportunities when they arise. Mainstream news outlets and social media generally don't focus on feel-good stories because kindness isn't deemed "newsworthy." Instead, they profit from sensationalizing the crazy, terrifying, and ridiculous. Unfortunately, kindness has been scarce in our political discourse for a long time.
What we fail to realize is how much all this negative media intake affects our emotions, leaving us feeling sad, irritated, or fearful. We may also fall into the trap of comparing ourselves to others, who present an often-filtered version of their lives online, making us feel "less than."
We may unknowingly develop perpetual scowls or "resting bitch faces" (RBFs) as we carry around anger, resentment, fear, or grief about the struggles we face. Numerous studies show the long-term effects of these negative emotions on our health — including stress, burnout, anxiety, depression, and various physical illnesses.
So, I think it's time we each ask ourselves: “Why not give kindness a try? For both myself and others?”
The key takeaway from this post is that, first and foremost, we must learn to practice self-kindness. Try to notice when you are being unkind to yourself. You might be surprised at how often you enter self-critical or self-judging mode. Pay attention to the negative self-talk you regularly subject yourself to — especially the harsh things you'd never say to another person. You can interrupt this negative cycle, correct your course, and instead choose to be gentle with yourself.
Instead, try to identify the many positive qualities you possess. Recognize the wonderful aspects of yourself, and say them out loud (“I am kind. I am considerate. I am friendly”). Notice how much better you feel.
In time, you'll become more aware of the many opportunities for kindness that present themselves every day. All you need to do is notice them and act on them — it’s that simple.
Kindness is the best form of humanity. - Doris Lee
I truly believe that if we all intentionally made an effort to identify opportunities for kindness, the world would quickly become a kinder, gentler place. You don’t have to wait for National Random Acts of Kindness Month in February — you can start right now.
You can check in on your elderly neighbor during a heatwave or cold snap. You can offer a smile to a retail employee who has just spent five minutes dealing with an irate customer. You can wave and say “good morning” to a stranger passing by. You can strike up a conversation with the person behind you while waiting in line at the post office. You can compliment a server on how great their uniform color looks. Notice how good it feels simply to acknowledge another person in a kind way.
The simple truth is: doing good does good! So, instead of thinking, “I’m just one person, what difference can I make?” recognize the power you have to change the world for the better by practicing kindness.
I invite you to join the kindness movement. All you need to do is make an effort to include at least one kind act per day, whether as a giver or a receiver. It's not hard at all.
If you're looking for daily ideas for kindness, check out the Random Acts of Kindness Foundation. The organization’s mission is to make kindness "the norm," and it offers free resources and ideas on how to show kindness at home, work, school, and in your community. No one is too young or too old to instill the virtues of kindness. Consider volunteering as a family so your kids can learn how rewarding it feels to help others.
Before we know it, we will have transformed our lives, created positive change for others, and helped make the world a better place — one kindness at a time. If "kind" is the new cool, then I intend to be one of the coolest people anyone could ever meet!
Thank you for being part of the Positive People Project!
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